Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Pessimism

A few weeks ago there was a post about Dana Falsetti in a Facebook group for fats that I follow. Falsetti is a plus-sized yogi who also talks a lot about body positivity. The OP posted, saying that she found the video of Falsetti inspiring. So far so good, right?

Get it.

Moments after the post went up, this comment appeared:
"Oh look another white small fat representing everyBODY"
 And I just couldn't freaking believe it.

There is literally no way to live your life anymore without ruining someone else's day. Even if those things are out of your control (like, say, being white or weighing less than 300 pounds, or even finding someone who has the audacity to fit into those categories to be inspiring). And it broke my heart to see it, because a few more comments down in the thread, someone said that she had been excited to go to one of Falsetti's workshops, but now she wasn't so sure because if other people think she's problematic...

Well, screw that.

I am sick to death of people telling other people what they can and can't enjoy, especially when the thing or person in question is not hurting anyone else. What baffles me the most is that most of the time I see this it's in a space that advertises itself as "safe".

There is nothing "safe" about a space that only reinforces the idea that there will always be some part of you that is lacking, or that your experiences do not count because you don't fit certain criteria. In fact, I have found these spaces to be a lot more damaging in the long run, because the people who don't fit in end up feeling more ostracized, and the people who do become part of a sort of delusional hive-mind that masks new forms of oppression under a screen of false benevolence.

I wish people could just love things and each other without being afraid of the repercussions that shouldn't even exist.

Sometimes I have a hard time believing that there is anyone good left in the world (and yes, this includes myself, dried up old hag that I am).

I think we're all going to "tolerate" each other to death.

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

What? WHAT!??: A Soapbox Moment

I try to not talk politics a whole lot on social media, because, frankly, most of the time I do not have the energy to argue with anyone who I find tedious. Today, however, I have been pushed to the breaking point by an article I saw on Facebook this morning: "Why I am a Woman Who Doesn't Support the Women's March".

Take a few deep breaths before you click on that link. Trust me.

Here is a soothing picture of baby otters, if you need it.
Okay, let's continue.

The author first assures us that she is not a "millennial feminist", in spite of what her age and gender may suggest. Yeah, you write for a website called Trump Truck. I don't think you have to worry about ever being called a feminist.

Let's go through her article point by point, shall we?
Being a woman is not a disadvantage

There is nothing that I cannot do that I want to. I can vote, work, express myself, bear arms, practice religion, and speak freely while living the American dream. What else do I need?
You can work, sure, but you'll make 20% less than what your male colleagues make. You can practice your religion, but only if you're Christian (I saw the other article on your site that praises God that Trump is finally going to do something about "the Muslims". Fight me.). And you can express yourself and speak freely... unless you're at the women's march, I guess.

Do you see the disadvantages, yet?
I am for equality, but not supremacy

Feminists are chanting to “Kill all male babies” and calling for women to just run up and kill men in the streets. How could this possibly be equal?
 It's not, but this is not what feminism is. You are citing one video made by one woman who has some... alternative ideas about how feminism works. I know that this might be difficult, but try to give us a little credit. No one wants to kill anyone, as far as I know.
We are built different, for different purposes

Men are naturally bigger and stronger, while women are smaller in stature and have the right tools to create a child. Women tend to be more nurturing with minds that can multitask, and men tend to do the more laboring work. We are not built to do the same things.
You're

Right

Women

Are

So

Weak


Biblically, the man is the head of the household

Yes, thats right. According to the bible, men are called to be the head of the household. This does not mean that there cannot be women leaders, but men are called to be the head.
The Bible says a lot of things about women (and other things) that are not necessarily true. Paul, in particular, says a lot of, uh, interesting things about women. But I digress. Most modern revelation seems to say that men and women should be equal partners in marriage, and that they should consult and support one another. Though, I'm actually not sure what point you are trying to make here.
Sometimes it’s just business, nothing personal

Sports channels do not have a vast majority of women viewers, just like Lifetime does not attract men. Therefore, ESPN is going to continue to show predominantly male sports, and Lifetime will continue to show us women the juicy thrillers that get us through our 4th bowl of Rocky Road ice cream. It’s nothing personal, just business.
What are you even talking about? Do you honestly think this is an issue?
Modest is hottest

How do they expect to get an ounce of respect when they’re out there with their ta-tas hanging out, and bright pink hoo-has on their heads? Its trashy, and embarrassing. No wonder no one takes them seriously??
Okay, you are twenty-three. Say it with me: "Breasts". "Vagina". And they expect respect because they deserve respect, no matter what they choose to wear or not wear. The same goes for you. You should be proud of these women in their glorious pink hats, because they were out there fighting for your rights as well as theirs.
They are protesting Trump, but he has not taken any of their rights

How does this make any sense? Donald Trump has not even been president a week and they are protesting him because……why? He’s not a woman? He hasn’t taken away any of their rights.
They were protesting to make sure he understood that there would be people standing up against his blatant sexism and dangerous policies towards women. And they were right to do so, considering that he repealed the ACA the very next day with no replacement plan in place. This hurts you, too, sweetheart.
They could fund their trip to DC for the march, but not their own birth control?

The women are demanding for birth control to be completely covered…..yet there are people with terminal illnesses that cannot even get the medicine they need because they cannot afford it. BUY YOUR OWN DANG BIRTH CONTROL!! It’s not the government’s responsibility to fund your sex life.
A lot of the people who went to DC were sponsored by other people who cared, people who probably *can* afford their own birth control, but understand the importance of making it available to people who cannot. Many people who could not afford to go to DC marched in their hometowns, because they are beautiful and strong and not afraid to fight for what's right.
Abortion is not fair

These women preach that it is their body so they can do it if they want. Correction, it is not their body or they would be the one to die during the abortion….And what about the female babies being aborted? What about their female rights? Or do those not matter?
See, now you are doing that double talk thing that I hate so much. "Oh ho!" you think, "Let's turn their on ideologies back on them! My question about female babies will surely make them think differently."

First of all, you are not fooling anyone. As soon as that female baby is born you will not care about her rights, either. Nor will you adopt her. She will end up in this country's extremely broken foster system, and then most likely she will end up on the street. It happens every day.

Secondly, no one gets pregnant just so they can have an abortion. I have always been so mystified by that concept. There is literally no one who goes out and has unprotected sex thinking, "It's okay! I can always get an abortion!" Abortion is a big, scary deal. We all know that. We all know that it has emotional and physical consequences. We get it. But sometimes it is the better option for some people, and we need to respect that.

Besides, banning abortions will not stop abortions. You know what will? Affordable birth control.
These women’s marches are hypocritical

I have seen numerous stories and videos of women who are pro-life or Trump supporters who were spit on and told, “I hope you get raped and need an abortion,” simply because they had a different opinion. Yeah, women equality, right? What a joke.
Sources? And I mean real, legitimate news sources. Nothing from The Blaze. Noting with "miserable hag" in the title. Seriously, cite your sources because I could not find any. I do not personally know any woman, feminist or otherwise, who would ever say "I hope you get raped." That is vile. I know that people say a lot of really stupid things when they are upset, but I don't think anyone who would ever say that could be considered a feminist. Or even a decent person.

Sigh...

We made it! Here's a cleansing baby sloth in a teacup.
It ends there.

I don't know this woman. I don't know what happened in her life to make her feel the way she feels. I don't know what experiences she has had or not had to shape her views. But it makes me tired.

I am so proud of all of my beautiful friends and relatives who marched. I am so keenly aware of your struggles and your purpose. I will fight for all of you until the day I die, because I believe in you, and in the work that you do.

You have so much worth. Do not let anybody tell you otherwise.

~~~~~

If you want to see a wonderful article about the March from a conservative's perspective, I recommend Why I Marched: A Letter From A Pro-Life, Republican, Anti-Government-Making-Women’s-Decisions, Stay-At-Home Mom. We're all in this together.